Vietnam

Population: 82 Million
Political System: Corrupt Communism
Religion: Money

National Motto: "Hey, friend, you want to buy a surfboard keychain? Cheap price! Okay, how about a postcard? A book? Many types! Hey, where you from? Maybe later?"

Good Things

  • Beautiful, interesting scenery
  • Low prices for lodging, meals
  • Not heavily touristed yet, so there's still lots of authentic Vietnamese culture

Bad Things

  • Transportation uncomfortable and rough
  • National conspiracy against sleep
  • Chilly northern weather in winter
  • Screw-the-foreigner attitudes
In January-February 2005 I was in Vietnam. These pages are a log of things we did there, and my unscientific opinions. For those who might find such things useful for planning their own trip, I've included as many details about where we went as I can. I've given prices in US dollars.

 

Part 1: Hanoi We arrived in Hanoi on the morning of Tuesday, January 18, 2005 and haggled for an airport taxi to the Old Quarter of Hanoi ($US8). We stayed at the Camellia II on 31 Hang Dieu Street ($16 w/ cheesy breakfast). There's some nice restaurants in the Old Quarter, including Little Hanoi and Le Thach Quan (2 Le Thach, next to the statue facing Hoam Kiem Lake), and some overpriced (the Cyclo Bar & Restaurant) or overpriced and boring (Long Van Cafe, next to the lake). The finest food was at the little hole-in-the-wall diners where a bowl of outstanding pho or bambo nambo was as little as 75 cents. There's lots to see in Hanoi, such as roaming the ancient Old Quarter markets, seeing the Temple of Literature, or taking in a water puppet show (next to Hoam Kiem lake). The streets of the Old Quarter are narrow and at times you need strong nerves to dodge the homicidal motorcycles and cyclos (bicycle taxis). It's also the noisiest place I've ever been in my life, and this is after living in Mexico. The chill of Hanoi January and the endless din of horns drove us southbound within four days.

Some stores in the Old Quarter, where you can buy 'authentic imitation' Rolex watches. 20th century sculpture at the History Museum. Vietnamese heavy metal! Evening at Hoam Kiem lake. "No, no admission charge. Enjoy your swim there!" A coin at the History Museum. I wonder if the Cola machine would accept it! My bambo nambo, under Minh's Jazz Club. One of the best meals I had in Vietnam, and for 75 cents a bowl! St. Joseph's Cathedral, right side. Was the grey before or after the soot of 8 million motorcycles? A traditional water puppet show with orchestra, at the theatre next to Hoam Kiem lake. Where's Kermit and Miss Piggy? Water puppet boat. "Every time we try to deliver an elephant this happens!" A day in the Old Quarter, Hanoi, minus the racket. Always ask for an upper-floor room, unless you live above a cement factory and miss home. Traditional (and not-so traditional) instruments for sale in the market. It's a fun place to wander around and buy things you never thought you needed. Plants at the Temple of Literature. The one on the right does look like Charles Dickens, doesn't it? Hoam Kiem temple. Suddenly, dude, I got the munchies. Wait, what's <i>in</i> that incense? The bridge to a temple, Hoam Kiem. Reflective and peaceful, with only 42 offers to buy postcards.

Part 2: Hoi An We took a sleeper car on the S1 train to Hoi An ($25) and arrived the next morning to sandal weather and sunshine. We stayed in the Vinh Hung II ($18) for one night and then five nights in the Thuy Duong (11 Le Loi, $8). Hoi An had great restaurants, such as the Mermaid (2 Duong Tran Phu), Before & Now (on Le Loi), and some places on the riverside where you can find local specialties such as Cao Lao or White Rose or take cooking classes. We had wedding clothing made at A-Dong Silk (40 Le Loi). They were fast, non-pushy, and even shipped it all to Hanoi for us to pick up. We made a day trip to My Son, the imperial ruins of the Cham dynasty (4th and 12th centuries), and our tour ($4) included a boat ride back with a tiny lunch. The tour included a pleasant stop-off at a pottery village where people chased us for fifteen minutes to buy junk, and a stop at a wood carving factory. Other nice things to do in Hoi An is take a motorcycle ($3-4) to nearby Cua Dai beach and pig out on prawns, and ride past the rice paddies on the way back. Hoi An wasn't as noisy as Hanoi, but at night the dogs made such a racket that we didn't sleep much, and so it was time to move on.

One of many clothing shops in Hoi An. Not really a guy's dream, but Ariel liked them. Woman demonstrating pottery-making. You mean you have to get your hands <i>dirrty?</i> Cheesy souvenirs for sale. Probably not made by traditional women in little villages. Bird cages in an upstairs apartment. There were lots of birds in Hoi An. It's better than horns all day. Grilled shrimp on the beach. It was not a good day for the seafood when we arrived. Sleep well, <i>perros</i>. You have a busy night of barking at nothing under my hotel room. Woodworking factory. Wonderful stuff, great furniture. I wonder if it would fit in my carry-on? My Son ruins (<i>Mee Sun</i>), south of Hoi An. Impressive, even if you're on a tour group: "Where's the <i>beeer</i>?" Tall ruin at My Son. Not quite Ankgor Wat, but the same civilization. A figure from the ruins from the Champa dynasty. "How do you like my new dress?" Pillars, My Son. Well, let's see how <i>you</i> look in seveneteen centuries! Cook, Hoi An restaurant. You don't argue with a chef with a knife like that. Gongs, Hoi An. I'd like to hear them all played. It would still be quieter than Hanoi.

Part 3: China Beach A one-hour ride on a tour bus took us just south of Danang to the Marble Mountains, which are made of— get this— marble. We arrived at China Beach, famous for a TV show in the 80s and for being a holiday place for American soldiers during the war, only to find that there wasn't much there. There's a few little diners and several hotels under construction, and we were lucky to find the Romance Hotel ($15) next to the beach, with its own restaurant. Other than a day trip to Danang, which is enough, there wasn't a lot to do there in late January. But the beach was quiet, and after the incessant sellers of everywhere else in Vietnam, it was nice to be left alone for a while. We then travelled from Danang to Nha Trang on the S1 again ($28).

Road near marble mountain with factory stores. "Do you have this in teakwood?" China Beach... shhh... There was no one there. It wasn't quite like the TV show. There's not really much to do once you've checked everyone's ticket. People told me I could get a case of crabs in Vietnam.. I guess it's true. Round boats on China Beach. "All hands to starboard!—uh, oh." It really is a sleepy place for <i>everyone</i>. Danang Cathedral. There are lots of Christians in Vietnam (who really like pink, apparently.) Rice farmers on the way to Nha Trang. Rice farmers on the way to Nha Trang.

Part 4: Nha Trang Vietnam isn't known for beaches, but Nha Trang isn't bad. There's no surfing, but the water was warm and there's a laid-back atmosphere in the town. We stayed at the Blue Star at 1B Biet Thu ($8) next to the beach, and again didn't get much sleep; Nha Trang appears to be a party place for Australians on college break. The locals go to bed by ten and are up by six, and there wasn't much nightlife in Vietnam— except for the hotel balcony in front of our room. The food was edible but nothing spectacular. Good Morning Vietnam and the Same Same But Different restaurants were fair but the overhyped Cafe des Amis and El Coyote were disappointments. It felt a little seedy at night in Nha Trang and some of the local laborers were a little hostile. But there's lots to do in Nha Trang. There's the pricey Lousianne Cafe with a closed beach and pool and good cake, or you can be ignored at the Sailing Club. We took a day trip on a boat to nearby Mun, Mot, and Tam islands ($6-8). Our tour with Linh Tours involved some morning swimming, a surprisingly good lunch, and some cheesy music from the boat crew band.

The beach. Not so quiet as China Beach with the people and the jetskis. I wonder if even the fish can get any sleep in Vietnam. A pleasant little park near the beach, with an officer on a bicycle in case of low-speed pursuits. The special home-made instrument boat band giving an afternoon concert. "If you don't like the music— there's the door." Lunch on the boat. Noodles, spring rolls, and fruit. A little thin for fat English tourists, but it's a pretty good meal for Vietnamese workers. Some fruit. Not really sure what this half-lime, half-orange creation was. Me parasailing next to the beach. I always thought the landings were rough, but if I had a cup of tea, I wouldn't have spilled any!

Part 5: Doc Let After a while the noise got to us again, and so on February 3 we took a taxi to Doc Let beach, an hour north. Our first stop was the ridiculous Ba Ho falls, a hike through the rocks to see a dribble of water, and then the meager salt fields near Doc Let, with our taxi driver 're-negotiating' our fare at the falls to $19 for the day. Jungle Beach resort was full, so we ended up at Doc Let resort, a dreary cabin next to the beach for $16 with a drearier restaurant. After one day we switched to Paradise Resort ($16, all meals), a short walk up the beach. It was so much fun and such good value we stayed four days. The crusty French owner runs a sort of hostel with little bamboo cabins and communal meals. We met an older couple from California, a couple from Holland, and a journalist from New York. The swimming was good and it was quiet. But after a while it was maybe too quiet and we left for Hoi An on the bus ($10). It was nearing Tet, new year, and the trains were getting full. Bad timing to be traveling anywhere in Asia.

A close-up of Ba Ho falls. Some falls. I need my macro lens to get a shot of actual water. Kids on the beach playing soccer at sunrise. Why is soccer so popular here? Equipment = ball. I always see lots of butterflies at waterfalls. This flock must have been wanting a ride back. A not-so good shot of the salt fields near Doc Let. All that hype for basically white piles of sand. Our bamboo hut at Paradise resort. It's nice to rough it, but high speed internet would have been nice too. Another butterfly on the plains next to Doc Let. Maybe it was looking for its motorcycle. Greenery at Paradise resort. To me they're still pretty. I guess the locals would find snow just as interesting. The beach, and the best swimming we had this trip. As annoying as Vietnam could be, it wasn't minus 20. Sunsets are poor in Vietnam, but sunrises are picturesque. We rose at 5:30 to see this one (once).

Part 6: Hué After getting little sleep on the bus, with frequent stops to see the same souvenirs over and over and a mid-night bus switch, we arrived in Hoi An to find not much open. We stayed in the adequate Hoi Pho hotel (4 Hai Ba Trung Street, $8), where I had my Lonely Planet book stolen through the grating in my window, and we managed to get a bus to Hue (way) the next day ($4, or 'special Tet price' of $7). In Hue we stayed in the very pleasant Sunrise Hotel ($12, with actually good breakfast) next to the Sinh Cafe bus terminal. As it was Tet and markets were closed, restaurants were even more sparse and food was generally poor despite Hue's reputation for dining. One honorable mention was the Omar Khayyim (Indian), next to the hotel. Things to do in Hue include pretending that you're rich at the sumptuous Morin Saigon hotel garden, or touring the old buildings inside the citadel, or... touring the old buildings inside the citadel.

Row buildings near the forbidden citadel. In Vietnam, even the buildings are thin. Hue's wharf. There wasn't much happening during New Year's, but the fish smell never takes a day off. Street life from the door of the Morin Saigon hotel. "Get those earplugs ready, dear." View from hotel roof at night. "23,000 light bulbs in our antenna and CNN is still fuzzy?" Garden in the Morin Saigon. I wonder what the poor people are doing tonight? Oh.. we're watching TV.. Elephant, forbidden city. How come<i> they</i> get in for <i>free</i>? I guess it's harder to turn away an elephant. One of the gates to the citadel. If it's so<i> forbidden</i>, why have such a fancy gate to attract people, <i>huh</i>? Another gate to the citadel area. The boy's entrance to the citadel bathrooms is marked in blue for easy reference. Captured American tank on display. "For raiding and killing the people." Enjoy your vacation. An even thinner building. "We have to take back the 45-inch TV. It doesn't fit." Court musicians, the Morin. I liked it, but Ariel thought it sounded like cats fighting. Play what you know, I guess!

Part 7: Halong Bay We took a night train back to Hanoi on February 11. We were charged $5 commission on a $24 fare without being told. It wasn't the end of the world, but at the time I was getting irritated with these minor scams. We talked with a friendly Austrian couple in our sleeping car, which in the S2 is built for four. Our train arrived early, which would be great if it wasn't four in the morning; we stayed at the Viet Anh hotel (11 Ma May Street, $15 with breakfast). We went on two short trips. The first, a day trip ($14), took us to some ancient pagodas and Tam Coc, a series of three caves and gorgeous spiky Apocalypse Now-ish mountains which you see in a paddled boat. It's stunning, but you need strong nerves to endure the pestering from your driver to buy cola or embroidery. The second was to Halong Bay (two days, all meals, $27). It was eerily foggy the first day, giving everything an otherworldly feel. The caves are pretty and it's fun sleeping on a boat, even if you feel a little damp the whole time. If forced to choose, Halong Bay is well worth seeing, but for flat-out scenery I would probably pick Tam Coc.

One of the, uh, Bich Dong pagodas south of Hanoi. How can monks be so reverent with names like this? Laugh if you like. Not many people can say their transportation is edible. The beginning of the Tam Coc canoe ride. It's a long swim to the nearest bathroom! The part of the boat ride where the tall people get theirs. Tam Coc means 'three caves.' Perhaps, in Vietnamese, it really means 'duck'! A peaceful boat ride along the tall spires at Tam Coc, south of Hanoi. "Sure it's peaceful! You don't have to paddle!" The end of the line at Tam Coc, and sales pitch #28. The geography got a little strange here. What kind of river just <i>stops</i>?  The docks near Hanoi for Halong Bay. The tours are apparently dangerous, as a boat sinks at least every year. But this is out of how many thousand? The boats spreading out. The one-man ones are what you get in the 'basic package.' Dragon boat prow, Halong Bay. At one point I don't think we could even see the end of its snout. Captain's wheel. I always like the ship's wheel. There's something tactile about going places with a big chunk of wood. Caves near Halong Bay. It's a little dank, but at least it's not foggy. Halong Bay. "Isn't that a beautiful rock— or ship— or bird— or something out there?" Eventually the fog lifted. "Waaitaminute... now I can see those mountains are all plastic!" Ariel looking out at the twilight from our ship room, docked in Halong Bay. I'd sleep better without her humming the <i>Titanic</i> theme. Some small rocks jutting out in Halong Bay. We went for a kayak ride to see, uh, more rocks. Once the fog lifted we could see how high they go. Floating village, near Cat Ba Island, returning from Halong Bay. Why do I still hear the sound of a lawnmower?

 

 

 

 

This'll be the player

Water Puppet Show, Hanoi 0:30 Morin Hotel Court Musicians, Hue 1:15
My Son Ruins, Hoi An 0:38 River Ride, Tam Coc 0:45
Boat Tour Cheese, Nha Trang 0:29 Cat Ba Village, Halong Bay 1:07
Wow!

Useful Vietnamese Signs!

Hoi An, Vietnam


And that was the end of our vacation. Back to wonderful work, work, and winter in Korea. But it was nice to get a full night's sleep again and I slept a great deal my first few days back. If you go, I hope you find some of this information helpful. If not, it's a web page.. here's your money back.
Wow!

Interesting Vietnamese Bathrooms!

It's official: the filthiest bathroom I have ever seen in the world, in Hue.

Green toilet paper for all your decorating needs.